Perfect Attendance is Over Rated

I remember when I decided that none of my children would ever get a perfect attendance award.

My oldest daughter was in second grade and the quads were in kindergarten. I went to the kids’ school about an hour into the school day and had them get my oldest out of class.  She came to the office with a very confused look on her face.  “Congratulations!” I said, “It’s your day!  You get to decide what we’re doing today and where we’re going to have lunch”.  She was beyond excited.   We spent the rest of the day together until we had to go pick up her siblings.  Thus, the special day was born.

Needless to say, she happily told her siblings all about her day.  They immediately wanted to know if they, too, would get special days.  I told them they would, they just didn’t know when it would happen.  So every year since then, I’ve taken them out of school for a special day.

It’s gotten a little more complicated as they’ve grown up.  Now I can’t just show up at school and surprise them.  We have to plan around tests and major assignments.  And their number one priority is sleeping in while the others go to school.

Over the years, we’ve played putt putt golf, painted pottery, seen movies, painted, done crafts, shopped, played video games and pinball machines, and gone bowling.  All the while talking and laughing.

I love special days.

With five kids in the house, there were few opportunities to have one on one time.  That was something I longed to have with each of my children.  So special days are my time to really connect.  I ask them about school and friends.  I ask about their dreams.  I ask about their struggles.  And I listen.  It’s my time to really hear what’s going on in their hearts and heads.  Or at least what they’re willing to share.  And mostly, they are willing.  I think it’s because they don’t have to worry about anyone else hearing or interrupting them and they have my undivided attention.

So when we go to the end of the year award ceremonies and other kids get perfect attendance awards, I clap and smile knowing my kids will never get one.  And I’m okay with that.   I’m willing to sacrifice that award for the great blessing I get from spending the day with each one of them.

I just finished this year’s round of special days.  I even got to have one with my oldest who was home for a week after finals and before heading to her summer job.

My husband said that next year will be my last year to do special days since the quads will graduate high school.  I hadn’t really thought about them coming to an end.

My hope is that they will continue.  I’m not sure what they will look like or how often we’ll have them.  I may not check them out of school, but maybe meet them at school.  Maybe our special days will become special weekends or special afternoons or special nights.  I just know I don’t want to lose that time to be with each one of them.

So while I think that showing up for school and work and other commitments is important; I think perfect attendance is overrated…..